New normal, new boundaries

Now as we emerge into public spaces after COVID-19 lockdown, it is time for us to define our new personal boundaries in social situations as per our safety and security standards. It is critical because our individual perception of risk and safety behaviours vary widely.

It is a global pandemic. Millions are impacted by the illness. Hundreds of thousands lost their lives. Entire world is shut down to stay safe. But reactions varied across populations, societies and individuals. Some were scared to step out, some were taking to streets in protest demanding their freedom to go outside. Now that we are told by governments to take our own precautions, it is a risky state of affairs. As long as lockdown lasted, there is some amount of uniformity of behaviour. Now, it is up to each individual. And that may be scary and stressful as each of us see it in a different perspective.

As we are allowed to step outside, and may be asked by our employers to start coming into offices, it is time to set acceptable boundaries with people we are going to interact. You may get annoyed with a colleague for not wearing a mask. You may feel indignant with a bunch of friends frolicking in a restaurant in close proximity without any safety precautions. You may feel pressured to join in and judged if you don’t. There are several social situations that demand you set healthy boundaries for your own protection.

First, determine what is acceptable for you. The basic safety precautions recommended are wearing masks, cleaning hands, maintaining social distancing, minimising number of personal interactions. What precautions are you religiously following? What do you consider as a risky behaviour? Which type of social situations would you consider worthy of taking risk to go out and attend? Have some clarity. This is important because each of us have different ideas about this unusual situation. Some feel responsible for others at home so strictly adhere to all the rules. Some may feel they are immune, no one at home to protect and their own freedom is more important. Be aware there are all sorts of reactions and which one is acceptable for you when you meet up with others either at office or friends.

Notice how people in your group are perceiving and reacting to this situation. Our behaviour varies according to our perception of seriousness of situation. You may see 400,000 deaths and increasing, all because of just one little bug as a scary scenario. Or you may see it like a flu but more deadly for elderly population mostly with co-morbidities. It also depends on your risk category. If you see yourself as high risk category, you may want to stick to those guidelines. You may feel anxious and stressed if someone in your family or friends is not following these precautions because it is a threat to your physical wellbeing. Be aware of your perception and your level of risk aversion. Also be aware that other’s perception may differ from yours. Don’t take it as ‘common sense’ and for granted. That may catch you off your guard.

Have some strategy ready to tackle any tricky situation you may encounter. Have a plan how you can set your boundaries and communicate with them. Don't allow yourself to be caught off guard or surprised into risky any behaviour by unexpected social situation.

If you see someone with unacceptable behaviour, you can politely point out your perception of risk and show your unwillingness to indulge in risky behaviour. Don’t make the other person wrong but point out your perception of risk and your personal rules.

Commit to your safety, not to give in to peer pressure - if others are not wearing a mask, it’s not a reason to remove yours and put yourself at risk. It is okay to be judged or ‘not fit in’ in such situations.

Feel free to leave an unsafe situation with a brief and polite apology. Even if it is an office situation, you are entitled to your own personal boundaries and your personal safety. It is not a time to feel shy or be afraid of reprisals.

Ask questions ahead and raise concerns about safety if you are invited to any group setting. Decline if you are not comfortable with the size of group or if it’s too closed in.

Remember your safety and wellbeing is your responsibility. Setting healthy boundaries is a skill you need to learn and this is an ideal opportunity to test your ability to maintain good personal boundaries.

#article #articles #covid #boundaries